and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
My vagina just recognized that song.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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