The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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