i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
