What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
