I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i already hear my dad disowning me
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
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