i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
