Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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