I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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