I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
