you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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