after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize