He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
