Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
