Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize