And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
My balls are so social today.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Just pee around me
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
