My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
