I wannas sexs uuuuu
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
