Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
