So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
