I'm going to jail i love you
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
