i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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