I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
