your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
