I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
