They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
