everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Randomize
