She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
