After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
