Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You need Xanax blowdarts
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
