White coat. Heels.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
