Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
