I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize