My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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