I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
