She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
