If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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