I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
