Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
