I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
