i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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