Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
