so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
