It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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