i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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