Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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