I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
