I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
