Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
