I heard we made out
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
