Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
