Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
